I'll Think of You

And when I’m on my death bed, my last thought won’t be of all the good deed I’ve done in my life. My last thought will be of how you stuck around when nobody else did. It will be of how a good guy took a chance on a depressed girl and how it didn’t turn out too bad. My last thought won’t be about the time I bought the homeless man a meal, but of every time you held me while I cried in your arms. It will be of all the comforting words you spoke when I was rocking back and forth and I didn’t know how to stop crying. When I die, I’ll remember your face, how your lips always looked kissable and your eyes we’re always hard and uncaring until you looked at me. I’ll remember how your hands felt when I held them. I’ll remember your cold nose pressed against my face and your cold hands holding my face as you kiss me. My last thought will never be of the good or wrong I’ve done.

I’ll think of you.

[Originally Written Thursday, October 20, 2016]